Episode 93 - Inside the Big Wins: Kyle Schlesser's 3 Daily Non-Negotiables That Keep It All Together
Episode #93 | Inside the Big Wins | Daily Non-Negotiables That Keep It All Together
Kyle Schlesser is back in studio, and this time the conversation goes somewhere most business podcasts are too afraid to go — marriage, guardrails, and what it actually looks like to run a company with your spouse without turning into glorified roommates. Kyle shares the three daily non-negotiables that keep him grounded, why he journals notes for each of his kids and his wife on his phone, and what his wife Katie meant when she looked him in the eye and said "we deserve your best, and we're not getting it." It's equal parts raw, practical, and the kind of conversation that makes you want to put your phone down and go bounce on the trampoline with your five-year-old.
About The Curious Builder
The host of the Curious Builder Posdast is Mark D. Williams, the founder of Mark D. Williams Custom Homes Inc. They are an award-winning Twin Cities-based home builder, creating quality custom homes and remodels — one-of-a-kind dream homes of all styles and scopes. Whether you’re looking to reimagine your current space or start fresh with a new construction, we build homes that reflect how you live your everyday life.
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Kyle Schlesser 00:04
She was just like, we deserve your best, and we're not getting it. That's a moment where it's like it's hard to sit there with yourself and be like, okay, why? Why am I not giving my best to the people that mean the most to me and giving my best to others who mean a lot, but the priorities got mixed up.
Mark D. Williams 00:32
Welcome to Pierce Putter Podcast. I'm Mark Lower Joss. Today, I've got Kyle Slusser back from Solid Ground Construction. We're having such a great conversation, I decided to make two out of this one, since he's in studio, so our last one was losers or winners. This one is less about losers or winners. This one's probably more about relationships, I think. If you haven't listened to the last episode, go back one week, we started touching base about owning a business with your spouse, and one of my favorite topics actually gave a keynote speech on it at Contractor Coalition about Mondrieux's great freedom, and I am so passionate, and they've served me so well in my life. I think it's not that I have it constantly changes, the right balance is constant, peace is constantly changing, but I feel like if you don't share what's worked for you, it's not that you have figured out, but like, hey, this is what works, and I also, a lot of times, I say these kinds of things in the podcast, because it keeps me accountable, and it reminds me of what I need to do. It's kind of like, just because you've read the Bible and you know the Bible doesn't mean you don't read it again, for sure. You need to keep reading, because you need to keep doing it's just like it's like exercise, it's like food, it's all things, you just, it's repetition. So, with that in mind, let's pick back up again. So, you and your wife, Katie, own your business together, and we were just talking about how date nights often get ruined. Let's talk a little bit about the challenges, the pros and cons of having a business with your spouse.
Kyle Schlesser 01:50
Yeah, yeah, it is a massive topic. Marriage, in and of itself, would take us weeks to be able to at least crack the shell on how to do that well, but like, then you add in this element of let's own a company together, let's see how that goes. It is, it is a master game of chess, that and the board is shifting constantly, and the pieces are changing, and you know it's just one of these things where it's like you can't ever just nail it down and be like, hey, we got this, because seasons change, I mean, we kids tell older,
Mark D. Williams 02:24
your quotes,
Kyle Schlesser 02:24
yeah, 10, eight, and five, so
Mark D. Williams 02:26
almost identical, though,
Kyle Schlesser 02:27
yeah, and it's like you record this four years ago, when the conversation is completely different, because it's just always a shifting target of how do you create balance in your life, and how do you establish peace in your marriage, and how do you make sure your kids are flourishing, because we don't want them just to exist, we don't want them just to barely make it, like we want you to be flourishing in every season, so how do we do this across the board and do it all well, and so as far as how to do marriage and business together goes, the guardrails are
Mark D. Williams 02:59
that's what really caught my ears. Let's talk about these guardrails, and let's talk, since it's kind of in the spirit of quote "losers or winners" was just a title. What were some of those early failures that woke you up and be like, "this isn't sustainable to be married and to be a partner that made you maybe change some of the business practices, if you will?
Kyle Schlesser 03:18
Yeah, so guardrails, the term I use there, credit back to Andy Stanley, long time ago, when we were in college, we did it, was a Bible study on, he does it on guard rails, and how to create guardrails in your marriage, and so now you can apply that to any situation, you can apply that to every business relationship you have, anybody who has a direct report to you, any of your managers that are working alongside you, like you need to have guardrails for everything, and it's not to keep you from doing what you want, it's to make sure you are focused on what you're called to and what you're supposed to be doing, because I don't know about you, our industry, we have a lot of ADHD that just bounces around everything you do, and so it's like, well, how do you stay focused in the areas that you need to be focused and allow someone else to take care of the stuff that they're supposed to take care of, and not do all of it all the time, and so guardrails are way that we've done that in our marriage, specifically when it comes to date night, so at the very beginning we had none, we knew the concept, but it was like we're just trying to establish ourselves and survive, and so it was almost attractive when I would work during the day, come home, dedicated time to kids, that's a guard rail where it's like I will be with you when you come home from school until you go to bed, and some I'm not perfect, I was on the phone texting emails, there was that happening, but it's like I'm not going to sit in front of my computer when you're home and just not exist in your life when you're only home for a few hours because you're going to school, and so that time is protected, and then once they go to bed, it was almost attractive if I came back downstairs and I started working again, because she kids, Kitty, I think she was like, oh, well, he's getting ahead. We're getting ahead, we're getting ahead, we're getting ahead, and then maybe a year in, it's like, well, no, now we're just not working efficiently, necessarily. And so that's when the white knuckling started to happen, and that's when, like, the big loser came of, hey, you're putting in way too many hours, I'm not seeing you as much, and you're not engaged. It feels like she put it, and she's so she's filled with so much grace for me, but she, she was just like, we deserve your best, and we're not getting it, and I was just like, that's a moment where it's like it's hard to sit there with yourself and be like, okay, why, why am I not giving my best to the people that mean the most to me, and giving my best to others who mean a lot, but the priorities got mixed up.
Mark D. Williams 05:48
There was it, so I can relate to this very well as a parent, particularly. Is it? Was it because the way it resonates with me is like when I'm not my best, it's because I'm tired, and I'm tired because of what I choose to put my energy into, and you know, we're, as you, you know, how it is with any parent, when you're explaining simple concepts to your kids, or, sorry, whether it's complex or not, but when you're explaining something to a child, if you ever done, you ever been in those moments, like, as you're teaching your kid, it like dawns on you, and you're like, oh, wow, that's that's what I'm supposed to do, wow, I wish that it's like patience is a great one, right, that's what I'm thinking right now, because it's probably one of my weaknesses, biggest weakness as an ADHD person would relate to, is patients. You know, we're not very good at waiting, and so, you know, explaining to Simon, my middle one, I said the other day, I was like, you know, you use up pace inches like a muscle, and if you, I run a lot, so like, if you run a long distance, like, and then you come home, you like, you need to rest, but to then to pick it up and run again is the patients, like I've used my patients with clients with, and they can be good clients, bad clients, it doesn't matter, you just use it up, and it also just energy, right, and so we go home, and it's like, you know, that's this, that small window, a couple hours of time with your family, and and then you know you might be short, or like you rush them off to bed, because you got to do something, and it's not fair to them, and every parent, everyone knows what I'm talking about, is total dad, parent guilt, yeah, and it's real, and you have to have some grace with yourself too, and all this too, because you can't, you're not robots, but like, how have you, what did you come to, that was my, that's what I'm relating to, and what you're saying is like, that's the guardrail of, you know, I can share some of my guardrails, but I'm more interested in hearing yours, yeah,
Kyle Schlesser 07:20
I, so one of them is journaling, so just writing out the thoughts, because
Mark D. Williams 07:26
so
Kyle Schlesser 07:27
many thoughts, so many thoughts come into your mind during the day, and so many people are requesting things of you during the day as the owner that you're just like, I don't have the bandwidth to keep it all organized, and so just writing things down, even in my note, or if you're using Builder Trend, like that's one of the things where it's like, as I'm walking through a job set, I'm just making notes, and I'm adding it to the to-do list out in Builder Trend, because it's like this is just needs to be out of my mind and into the mind of the people that can do something about it, and so making those lists, and that's not just for business, like that's for marriage too, that's for parenting, like I've got notes on my phone for all three of my kids, that is like, as things come to my mind, whether I want to like speak a word of encouragement over them, or if I feel convicted because I didn't apologize in the right time, or like I heard something on a podcast that I thought would be interesting, and just like wanting them to be a part of it with me. Same thing with Katie, like I'll make my notes on my phone, just so that those thoughts don't get lost with all the other stuff that's going on, so that's a big one, and then the other thing I do is I have a, and this is from a sermon that I listened to, but it was list three things that you were unwilling to compromise that day, and so it's
Mark D. Williams 08:38
sorry, did you do this every day,
Kyle Schlesser 08:39
so every day, okay, and so it's
Mark D. Williams 08:41
sorry, I'm very interested in how. So, does that mean like, so in the morning, like, you consciously think about this, like, so each day they would change. Okay, amazing.
Kyle Schlesser 08:49
Yeah, and so Craig Groeschel, a Life Church, he's the one that gave me the idea. So I have a journal that's dedicated to that, and so I'll put those three things in, and I'm like, at the end of my day, I have to have these boxes checked, and it's not like, hey, 9:30pm rolls around and I'm getting crossed and I'm crossing off. It's like intentional during the day, you put your thought in and you do it with excellence. Get those three things done, and then at least you have that accomplished. And there are going to be many other things during the day that
Mark D. Williams 09:19
take what? Give me some example. I'm very interested in this. So, like, your morning routine, you know, you're up, you're working, you're.. we talked a little bit about this before during our sound check. I had you do it, but, like, you know, you're reading, you're.. you know, you might exercise things like that. When are you writing these three things down? At what point?
Kyle Schlesser 09:34
Yeah, so the way that I've structured my day is the first part of my day I give back to God, and so he gets my best, if you will, kind of going in line with the conversation. He gets my best, which is going to be me when I'm not distracted, I don't have a ton of other things going on, and that's when I can just kind of sit with him and go, okay, what do you want me to do today? And instead of at the end of the day going, okay, did I get it right or not? Not I sit with him at the beginning of the day, and I go, "Okay, God, like, what is it? What is the.. what are the most important things? And I just give him time to speak to me, and I just give myself some space to just breathe, and not have the 15 phone calls that I have to respond to, and the 100 text messages, and the 300 emails, and because that's all real, but if you are disciplined enough, and I don't get it right every day, so don't mishear me. But that's the way that I structure the very beginning of the day, and then it's a little bit of reading, and Katie joins me in this, and so it is. It's awesome, because that's a way to unify your marriage before your day starts and kids gets kicked off. But then I go downstairs and I'll do a workout, but that
Mark D. Williams 10:42
works, so you're doing that, you stay in your room for that,
Kyle Schlesser 10:44
I'll go downstairs, okay? Just because kids are all upstairs, yeah, just want to have some time, and the coffee's downstairs,
Mark D. Williams 10:50
yeah. Well, it's funny because I was already making a note of how I want to modify mine a little bit. Is that so? Is that meditation? Are you praying like I'm very curious to like the how someone who tries to read, and you know, meditate. Meditation is my biggest weakness by far. Mainly, to be that's one of the reasons why I run a lot, and I, for me, running and quiet, like I process. If I do like book tapes, and I like podcasts, and I like all the things. I actually listen to very little music. I mean, I love music, but I don't. I find that, like, for me, it's when I'm exercising, you know, especially if I'm going for a couple hour run, like it's that time in nature, I'm just I'm thinking about all these different things, that's for me, that's a way that I can kind of counteract my ADHD, but also in sort of kind of a pure flow state. How do you manage it in the morning? Do you get a flood of thoughts right away about the work day, or how do you combat that?
Kyle Schlesser 11:39
It comes in different ways, and I think the most common is if I need to focus myself and my mind, so I'm not thinking about the 100 things to do that day, I just need to focus on one thing to be able to allow my mind to kind of expand and rest, and then after that happens, that's when it's the ideas that I feel like are not self-generated, necessarily, that's from the Lord, that are just dropped into my mind, going, "Okay, follow up with this person, okay, give this person a call, okay, spend some time doing this during the day, and so I'll make a list during that'll fill my day as if it's not already full enough, but it will, there then there are gaps when I'm driving and things that I can just follow up on the list,
Mark D. Williams 12:22
correct me if I'm wrong, but there's a little bit like if you were a lot of times when I could just speak for how I pray, but like a lot of times when you, I pray with the kids, or if I pray myself, like I'm praying with my intention, but there's those rare moments and times where you stop praying, but you're still quiet, and it dawns on you, and you're like, God, what would you want me to pray for? Oh man, and then it's like the doors open, right? Yeah, and so I've been very.. more than my grandma's 99 today might be her last day, so the next couple days, and she's had a beautiful life, and so my prayers have been a lot different the last couple days, just thinking about my Grandma Lou and kind of her transition from this license, and all these conversations with my kids about it, right? It's really a beautiful moment with the children, and you know, having this beautiful future that we're talking about. And so, right now, I feel like personally, like this conversation is at a very good time, because I'm thinking about it's easier for me to meditate right now, because I'm thinking about somebody else. And so, which is, guess what, God wants you to do. I read
Kyle Schlesser 13:19
this, and man, this hit me between my eyes so hard. Is if you were to say so, today's Monday. If you were to fast forward to next Sunday, and you got this little whisper from God going, every prayer you prayed this week I say yes to, would your prayer life change? And I just sat back, and I was like, like goosebumps to my core. I'm like, man, I don't pray about the right stuff. Like, I don't. Why am I praying about having a good day? Well, it's gonna be a great day. Why am I not praying for the things that are completely out of my control? But if he said yes to it, the whole world would change. And so I just sat back, and I was like, man, and I talked to my family about this. I'm like, we're doing it wrong, and so that wasn't, not to be mean, but like, let's change the way that we're focusing ourselves, and we're praying, and let's change the way that we're approaching how we do our days, because it's just not supposed to be about me being the best, me being better today, although that'll naturally happen because of the way that we structure our lives, but it's so much bigger than that, and so let's not put God in this little box and just ask him, almost like a genie, like he's not a genie, he's way bigger than that, and he cares about way more people than I know, so let's let's pray that way too well, it's a little
Mark D. Williams 14:36
bit like the checklist, right, I mean it used to be in my 20s and 30s I'd read and then you'd be done reading, and then you, it was like, check, but that's not the point of reading, and so now I've allowed myself some grace, like I'm okay if I read just a verse, and I used to always feel like I had to read a chapter, yeah, and so now it's like, well, but why, and especially at that time in the morning, like all the engines are not running super clear, like. My peak efficiency is probably between like 745 and 11, right, post endorphins from the run, and all you know, breakfast, all that kind of stuff, but like you know at 430 in the morning, you know, it's still a little groggy.
Kyle Schlesser 15:10
Kenny fell asleep once, yeah,
Mark D. Williams 15:11
totally 100% Going back to your three, I'm still curious about how you get the three things, the list, like what if you don't mind sharing, like what was your three this morning?
Kyle Schlesser 15:19
Yeah, yeah, so oddly enough, one of them is to get the lawn mode.
Mark D. Williams 15:24
Yeah,
Kyle Schlesser 15:24
it's just like one of those words, like,
Mark D. Williams 15:26
and this is going back for in case people got lost with my ADHD leading these questions. Sorry about that. You're turning into gears builder is early on, you just said three days or three things each day, and then you go back and like check them off, so like those three things. Okay,
Kyle Schlesser 15:40
yeah, yeah, so I, I'd like to kind of group them where you can, like, one or two is going to be business, because that's going to take up the majority of my day, and then either one or two is going to be personal, so that I know that I'm dedicating intentional time to both parts of my life, because they're both very important, and so, like, mowing the lawn is kind of personal, but it's kind of selfish, I need to get it done, so I'm gonna get it done, like for business, like we need to get permits pulled, and so it's like, let's have the conversations, let's make the phone calls, and let's get things submitted, have to do it, non-negotiable, has to get done today, so that's one of them, and then the third one, you know, this one was a little bit looser for me, it's just like, okay, well, let's figure out how I can invest a little bit more thought and intention into Katie. We've had, we have a very busy season right now, and I don't take pride in that. It's just like we have a lot that's being required of us, and so how do I still see her? Because a lot of times we can turn into roommates if we're not careful, and you go back to, like, marriage and own a business. Roommates become really easy and comfortable, but allowing her in on some things that I wouldn't normally, during the day, just be like, "I'll take care of it, but, like, take the time to just call her and be like, "Hey, I want to just ask your opinion on this, and it could be work, it could be personal, but just making sure that she's, she feels seen and heard today is like
Mark D. Williams 17:01
one. Oh, thank you for sharing that. I like that one. This episode is brought to you by Pella Windows and Doors. I've used Pella for 21 years as the exclusive window company on every one of my builds. When people ask me who I trust for windows and doors, it's Pella every time, their craftsmanship, their innovation, the top-tier service make them a no-brainer for any custom home builder or designer who demand the best. Whether you're designing something bold or building something with timeless elegance, Pella has you covered. They're also the only window company that has a lifetime warranty on all of their windows. I've gotten to know all their people at Pella corporate, as well as locally here at Pella Northland, I'm proud to call them our partners and our friends. Visit pella.com to learn more and connect with your local reps today. For more information, you can also listen to episode one, where I interview the Pella Northland founders, as well as episode 109 where we talk all about their latest innovation with the steady set window. Going back to the original part of the conversation, the guard rails, and it's funny because everyone that I've, I've interviewed a lot of husband and wife teams, because a lot of my mom and dad were them as well, right? And it's funny now as a kid, I don't remember one way or another, because, like, you're a kid, you just remember it being, you know, just it was really important, like we had dinner together, and like we always.. I don't.. it's funny, I have no really memory of my dad working. I mean, I knew he worked, but like, I just remember he was.. he was at every baseball game, every soccer game, like he was always there. So I don't ever remember, like work taking away from our family,
Kyle Schlesser 18:33
that's powerful. It is
Mark D. Williams 18:34
powerful, and like.. and it wasn't that I knew my dad didn't work, of course I knew he worked, but it was more like I never felt like he chose work over us, and you know it's like funny, because my, it kind of hits you hard, because I really try to have good boundaries that way, and I talk about a lot on the podcast, but like you know, sometimes, especially early Saturday mornings, you know, I'll try to get like an hour or two if I'm behind, I feel like everyone says, well, we're kind of always behind, right, but it's like anyway, so you know, you want to catch up a little bit, or if the kids are on taking naps, and like it's funny because Simon asked me that, he's like, "Dad, why are you, why are you on your computer? And so, just even what you're saying about, and like, there are things we do need to get done, and so I tried to explain to him, like, I'm trying to get stuff ahead, because next week is really busy, and we have some stuff, you know, with family plan, or we're going to take a half day with you, because we're going to go do this, that, and so I'm trying to get ahead, and like, I don't. Sometimes I don't know if it's justification. Is it reality? Do you have to apologize? Just, I guess the most important thing is just to be aware of it, and to check in. And probably where it comes to your spouse is checking in with your spouse, because it's probably not your seven year old should not be making your overall plans, not that you shouldn't care about their input, of course, but like, at least your spouse has the perspective of like saying, like, "Hey, Mark, Kyle, yeah, you are, you're working a little too much this weekend, how about you put it away? Or, you know, no, it's fine, you've been way more present than you've given yourself credit for. Yeah, have you had conversations like that with Katie?
Kyle Schlesser 19:54
Yeah, yeah, for sure. And even with my kids, like, I've had intention. Conversations where I'll sit down with them and I'll be like, How do you feel like I'm doing, and then don't cut them off, just allow them to give you some truth, because kids do that, and they do it well, sometimes it's going to hurt, and that's a good thing, because they're the next to my wife, they're the most important people in my life, and so if I'm not doing things well when it comes to my relationship with them, they should have the space and freedom to be able to tell me, 'Hey, Dad, you're dropping the ball here, which, like, yesterday the best part of my day was I bounced on our trampoline in the backyard with my five-year-old for like an hour and a half, and it's like, I'm, I am to a fault, I'm a big kid, like, I, I love all things high energy and super fun, and I would love to, if we go somewhere with a lot of people, I'd rather be with the kids, running around and like goofing around, than I would be necessarily talking to some of the adults, and so that's just the way God made me, and Katie's like, hey, you gotta like, you gotta sharpen up a little bit here, and I'm like, I'm sorry, it's just way more fun over there with the kids,
Speaker 1 21:05
like,
Mark D. Williams 21:05
Kyle, time to come in for dinner,
Kyle Schlesser 21:07
five more minutes. She, she jokes that she is raising four kids instead of three, because I'm part of that, but you know that is, that is a real piece of it, is like, I want my kids to know that their voice is heard, Mom and dad have the authority, but their kid, their voices are heard in our relationship, because I want when the conversations mean a little bit more, because they're a little bit older, and the trials and the issues are a little more real, that they know that mom and dad hear them, and that they have a space to be able to say that to us, and that's the same thing with Katie, I want her to feel that exact same way with me, and she has a, like, I said at the last podcast, she's a truth seeker, and so if something doesn't quite add up with me, you talk about, like, the priorities of the day and getting things done. If I get done to the end of the day, and Katie and I have, like, a recap, just so we can kind of put a bookend on our workday, talk about guardrails, right? Put a bookend on our workday and transition, and be like, okay, now we're in parent and married mode. When we have a recap for the end of the day, if something doesn't add up, she's gonna be like, what are you talking about? And I just.. I get that gut feeling of like, oh shoot, I missed the mark here. All right, Katie, tell me how I missed the mark here, and just being humble enough to say, yeah, I screwed up here, and I'm gonna allow you to speak into that, so that tomorrow I can make it better.
Mark D. Williams 22:23
Is this recap? Is that something you do after dinner, like where you're cleaning up randomly before bed? What does that look like?
Kyle Schlesser 22:30
Most we try to do it before we even start cooking dinner and being with the kids. Sure, so like I'm driving home from a job, so I'm calling her and just going, "Hey, and she's even told me she's like, why did you? She'll, I'll pull in the garage, and I'll get out of the truck, I'll go inside, and I'll start working. She's like, why did you even come inside? She's like, just sit in your truck until it's done. I'm like, that's a way better use of my time, because I don't have the three kids that are wanting to see me, right? And, like, so excited that I'm home. I mean, if I walk in through the door and I'm on my phone, they're gonna be like, oh, Dad's home again, and you're like, oh, that hurts, like,
Mark D. Williams 23:02
when you're home, be home,
Kyle Schlesser 23:03
yeah, yeah, for sure.
Mark D. Williams 23:04
Well, it's funny, I mean, there's like, you, I mean, I don't always get it right, but it's one of the things that I feel like we give my spouse a lot of credit for this, and really my parents too, but, like, you know, I pick the kids up every day at five, we have dinner at 530 but I don't check emails at nights and weekends, that's a boundary that I've set for, and I'm also honestly terrible at night. Me, I'm just tired, like I'm really good in the morning, I'm just a morning person. And so it's like I've even started asking Claude AI to sort of mess around with my schedule, like how would I look at my schedule over the last two years and look forward a year and recategorize my time blocks to, in my, you know, my best energy is between for work stuff, anyway, would be from like eight to one, and then arrange meetings, because I always get energy from people, and so I'm thinking about, like, right now for our Thursday episodes, we're recording at 10 o'clock on Mondays, but really, what I'll probably start doing is taking these interviews and moving them to like two or 3o'clock in the afternoon, because I, my energy usually starts to dip, but for an extrovert, I get energy from people, so it's like having people come to the studio. So, anyway, just little stuff like, as we get to know ourselves in our own habits, like, how can we be more effective? Yeah, but there's, there's always times and exceptions where we have to. I feel like, again, giving grace to yourself. The reason I say this is, like, have I broken those rules? Yes, many times. Will I break them again. Yes, but the intention is not to, and the intention is to try again. And so I, I love what you shared about the three things. I'm gonna have to think a little bit more about that.
Kyle Schlesser 24:29
Yeah, well, even to speak a little bit more into what you just said, working out that muscle of reflection, I think at the end of the day, in the end of the week, the only, the only way to prevent burnout, like you talked about, you're 18. The only way to really prevent that is to allow yourself to reflect and be like, okay, honestly, what happened today? And honestly, how did I react or respond? And the key word there is honestly, like you have to be okay, like it's.. I had someone say to me years ago, but are you okay with the man in the meat? Mirror at the end of the day, and it's like, well, if you don't even take the time to look in the mirror at the end of the day, how are you going to know? And so just take a moment at the end of the day, and whether it's with your wife or your, if you're in a business with another partner, like schedule time to be able to sit down and say what's going well and what didn't go well, and like how am I responding here, and where are the efficiencies, because if you don't do that, you're going to just continue to plateau year over year, and that's when the burnout comes, because it's going to continue to be heavy, because it is construction is heavy, there's a lot of requests, and there's a lot of asks,
Mark D. Williams 25:31
and I think entrepreneurship to top any business, too, sure, right, I mean, relationships are life is, you know, you mentioned in the previous one about the mountaintop experience, you can't live up there, though. I love that, that comment, and someone who loves the mountains, like, you have to enjoy the journey, but I mean, you know, you might spend 1012, hours hiking up to the top of, uh, you know, 14, or in Colorado, you get up there, you probably only, you know, I'm not even sure you're gonna have your lunch up there, because pretty cold, so you're gonna have a snack, take a few photos, look around, you're like, oh, this is great, but, like, I hope you enjoyed the journey, yeah, because that's really what it's about, and so,
Kyle Schlesser 26:01
yeah, yeah, and I even to go a little bit further with that, you know, the journey requires preparation, and that requires you to have the strength to be able to sustain you to get up the mountain, just like in work, if you're going to continue to elevate what you do, you have to build your muscles, you have to be stronger, you have to be more disciplined, you have to have time to reflect, you have to do all of these things and put them into practice? Otherwise, you're going to get to the mountain and be like, I blacked out for the last hour and a half. I'm just glad I'm here, so I can take a break. And you're like,
Mark D. Williams 26:28
you know, you just said something that's that just triggered something for me. I think you know people, regardless of what you want to do in your career, if you were, let's say, a remodeler or a builder a few years in, and you look at some of the top builders in the country, let's say you go out to Park City, and you see these builders that are building 30, $40 million houses, and you want to do that. It wasn't done in a day, it wasn't done in a couple years, you're talking 10 years, 20 years, multi generation, and not that you can't compress that time, but the point is, you have to build systems, you have to have experience, it's not going to be done in the immediate time, and to relate to, like, running, you know, because I like, I've gotten into ultra running, like, you have to start with a 5k yeah, and then the 10k and then the half marathon, then the marathon, then the 50k I mean, there is a progression, it's probably why a lot of the elite homes, in terms of price, tend to go to people who are more experienced and older, because it does, it's not that they're a better, I don't like the word better or worse, that's not the point. They're more experienced, they have sort of earned that trial by fire, they've gone through all those things. And here's what's beautiful, the ones hopefully at the top, they're willing to talk about it and share about it. It's honestly, it's not been.. I always thought that getting guests on the podcast would be difficult. It's super easy. In fact, I'm booked out for like a year. It mainly because people are happy to share their story. Absolutely, because this kind of format, yes, radio has been around forever, but this kind of format, where you can ask people, like people are happy to share their story, knowing that by just by sharing, and like what you've shared today, who knows how many 1000s of people will listen to this podcast, but like I mean, I hope it inspires them beyond business. Obviously, you and I, you know, just being people of faith, like I hope this touches people on a level that, like, they realize it's okay to self-reflect, it's okay to fail, it's okay to be great. You don't have to apologize for any of these things. No, you just have to tomorrow list your three things and do it again. Yeah, yeah, if
Kyle Schlesser 28:20
you have to repeat, it's gonna be okay. Yeah, I laugh because I've got one buddy who's training for a marathon, and then one just did the High Rocks competition, if you know what that is. Yeah, and both of them, talking to them through the journey, they're like, this kind of sucks. And there are days and weeks where it's like, I don't want to do any of this, and like, they have to eat massive amounts of food, and it's, it's not staying with them, and it's staying in the wrong places, because it has to sustain them, and they're like, I'm not muscle mass building, I'm just building to sustain me for 26.2 miles, and this isn't fun, and like, even you go back to, like, biblical times, Noah built the ark in 100 years, like, can you imagine doing one thing for 100 years, and you know, there's.. it's not a.. there's some time change there, but like, yeah, I bet you, he had a hard day or two, just like we do, and just like the guys that are out there building at the mountaintops in their 30 $40 million homes, they didn't get there by accident, they pushed through the hardest of hard days, days that you and I look at and go, I couldn't even fathom you had that
Mark D. Williams 29:22
length of time, is no joke, that I never thought about it. Well, I mean, I have thought about it, but not in the context of building a home, like I think I've never really had. So, my buddy Brad Levitt builds, you know, 20 30,000 square foot homes down in Arizona. Like, honestly, I'm just not that interested in, you know, there's a handful of builders around here that are, you know, that want to be.. I'm no one's also ever asked me, so I guess if they ever.. I guess I'd have to, but the idea.. but the idea that I would have to be on the same project.. I mean, you're probably a year to two years in design alone, and then you're probably two to three years to build.. I mean, that is just a.. that's five years of your life, and it's.. I guess with the right people, why not? It'd be great, but. I just, I don't know, I don't know that my mental makeup is not ready for a five year project. Personally,
Kyle Schlesser 30:07
yeah. Well, you, you start to even I do it on our jobs. I envy the carpenters and the tile setters and the guys who are like, I was here for two weeks and I was gone and I didn't have to think about it ever again.
Mark D. Williams 30:17
And they come back at the end for finals, yeah, like the electricians, right? They're there for 10 days, and they come back there, and look, wow, the house looks great. You think you haven't been here in a year.
Kyle Schlesser 30:24
Yeah, you're just like, I barely got through this one. Yeah, but it's the reality is like we are, we're here, and we're building that muscle, and to sustain us for the long term. It's just, it's just how this works.
Mark D. Williams 30:36
Well, I want to respect your time again, and thanks for coming in the studio. And we'll have everything in the show notes. Audience, thank you for tuning in to another episode of The Curious Builder, Mondays and Thursdays. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks for tuning in to Curious Builder Podcast. If you liked this episode, do us a favor, share it with three other business owners. The best way that we can spread what we're doing is by word of mouth, and with your help, we can continue to help other curious builders expand their business. Please share it with your friends, like and review online, and thanks again for tuning in.
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